lay.out

The objective is to get down questions that plaque my mind. Clearly, for once not in an obscure format, something that helps me get answers.

I can never get out of my mind what I have missed, or rather ignored. I have read no poetry, never looked at art, read good books. And here when people talk about the same I am lost, I have tried everything; pretending I am familiar with the topics, asking stupid questions bluntly, but most of all I'm trying to catch up. But as i delve
into something the content grows, to enormous proportions. And also most of the material I can not comprehend or appreciate, i want to, but have no idea how. I've tried to catch up on so much, i've no idea about any of the topics pursued. I have read books, have been around on the internet, seen movies, and can cite vaguely from most of them, but still have no understanding, no reasons, no responses to the how's and why's.

What is the solution. Do I shut out some areas, and be as ignorant to them as i was earlier and try to focus on something specific. I've tried this but failed. I get drawn to what i want to be ignorant of. Is there still hope. And there is always the fact that I am ignoring the so-called duties as an engineering student.