The big Great Successful megalomaniac ME

no life, no ideas, no original opinions, no interesting conversations, not even arguable small talk. I am that who should best be kept from the world, lest i waste others minds filling them with useless information trying to hide, the real uninteresting, fool in me, no understanding of life, responsibilities, of friends, family. I am one that has impartially betrayed all.

Hope is lost, but desperation is yet to sink in, do not mistake me for a modest man, the enormous, but hollow ego will snap back. I understand that I mean nothing, that failure has already set in - for life. But also that control is lost, the mouth speaks, barks rather, without permission, without consent.

Why I type this, because that inner ego irks me to tell the world of my misery. I am not an orphan, an underprivileged, have no mental or physical handicap. A mind and body within all limits of normalcy, of mediocrity. Still I am capable of falling below all expectations. Whatever, wherever lies the 'me' in the body, the mind or the soul, i believe is the loser, the one, capable of taking everything and producing nothing. But still it demands respect, wants to reach out, do nothing , but attain great heights, the one you would love to hate, the one capable of mediocre statements like these, and still having the nerve to let them out.